"There are lots of rumors circulating around about you, Father Maxime," Thomas said gravely . . . "I am speaking specifically about the case of Rosa. You see, I am a friend of the family. They feel hurt, particularly the father. Their complaint is that you did not prevent their daughter from becoming a nun and that you treated them harshly."
"Harshly?" Father Maximos reacted with surprise.
"That you accused her father of not being a good parent. Well, I came here to find out for myself what's going on. We are speaking openly and freely now, yes?"
"Of course, of course," Father Maximos reassured him.
"This is my question to you," Thomas continued with force in his voice as he fiddled with his worry beads. "This young woman, a university graduate and a trained architect, had made plans to go to America and finish her studies. But since the day she came in contact with you, she began to get oriented toward monasticism. Her parents and relatives feel that you have been a bad influence in her life. Were you in a position to prevent her from becoming a nun? Please forgive me for being so direct with you but I raise these concerns for the sake of clarity."
Father Maximos sighed . . . "Let's start from the beginning. How did I get to know Rosa? One of my tasks here at the monastery is to provide people the opportunity for confession. I have no idea who comes to see me. I don't know who they are, where they come from, what kind of job they hold. Often I don't even ask for their names. As a monk I avoid public appearances as much as I can and stay away from social gatherings. I do not accept invitations to private homes. My life is clearly monastic. Anyway, I saw Rosa only a few times. In fact, the first time she came for confession she was with her father. He even thanked me for having an audience with his daughter. They came for confession during a Saturday, when I see people all day long. When there are so many waiting for confession, I can only see each person for no more than ten minutes. In their case, I discovered later that her grandfather, who was a priest, was my own spiritual guide and confessor while I was a teenager at the Paphos gymnasium."
"I knew the late Father Kyrillos very well," Thomas said excitedly . . . "I remember," Father Maximos continued, "that Rosa had a lot of questions in her mind and wished to continue her studies in philosophy. At the same time a young man who came for confession told me that he wished to marry and that he was attracted to Rosa. . .The young man was too shy and I volunteered, with his permission, to mention it to Rosa so that they could go out and get to know each other. Now please do tell me Thomas, had I been interested in converting Rosa into a nun would I play the role of a matchmaker?" Father Maximos asked in earnest.
"Obviously not," Niki [Thomas's wife] rushed to interject as Thomas nodded reluctantly.
"Well, the two of them did go out together but it didn't work. The next time Rosa came for confession, she told me categorically that she was not interested in marriage. Her deepest yearning was to become a nun. 'Look Rosa,' I said, 'it is a very serious decision to abandon the world. You have no experience living in a monastery to know what such a life is all about.' She was working as an architect. I advised her to continue in her profession and wait for a year to see how she would feel by then. She agreed. But a few months later she came to announce that she had made up her mind to become a nun. Once again I advised her to wait a while longer in order to make sure that she truly wanted to spend the rest of her life in a monastery. She waited until Christmas. Then she came to me and said, 'Look Father Maxime, either you don't want me to enter a monastery here in Cyprus, in which case I will go to one in Greece, or there is some problem about myself that you just don't want to share with me.' "
"I told her that I had no right to order her not to become a nun just as I had no right to order her to become a nun. 'You are a grown woman of twenty-five,' I said to her, 'and just as you have the right to marry anyone you wish you also have the right to become a nun.' I urged her to discuss the matter with her parents . . . She did. They all came here including some other relatives. That was the day they claimed I did not treat them well. They were all together and started accusing me of being the cause of their daughter's decision to become a nun. Everything was up to me, they insisted, and [they] demanded that I should order Rosa to give up her plans to become a nun. I tried to explain to them in vain that it was impossible for me to do such a thing."
"Is monasticism the only way to God?" Thomas asked abruptly.
"Of course not," Father Maximos responded. "But it is one way."
"Excuse me for getting off the subject, but before we go any further can you please briefly tell me what monasticism is, according to you," Thomas asked . . . "According to Evagrius of Pontus, a desert father of the fourth century," Father Maximos continued, "monks are those people who have separated themselves geographically from everything and everybody and yet are invisibly connected with everything and everybody through prayer and the love of Christ. According to Saint Maximos the Confessor, monks are those people who have removed their minds from the world of material objects, and through continence, love, prayer, and chanting, they become totally focused on God. And another elder thought of monks as those who have nothing else in this life except Christ. This is what we try to do here."
Kyriacos Markides,
The Mountain of Silence, pp. 26-28.
(The conversation will be continued in future posts. Stay tuned.-JLB)